I’m just trying to get through each day. I didn’t realize how much I missed having some one in my life that cares. Hell yes you stand a chance, Becky! We all have stuff at this time in life. Sounds to me like you’re simply a loving, responsible woman. Will there be some men who will pass because of your situation?
Dating sites are just a way to suck money out of men. You mainly have scammers, Pros and clowns to deal with. The normal women don’t want to travel more than 10 minutes away from their place to meet. So, of cause it’s long traveling time because they won’t meet you halfway. Then you find out that they’ve been lying to you when you meet. I’ve cried bitter tears about being single at this stage of life (I’m just over 50), but I am slowly coming to the end of that grief cycle.
Empathy for men is something I teach as a primary principle of dating like a grownup. I was an older guy dating wonderful women 15 years younger. The main thing I can say is we are really no different than at 25. Don’t double think what he may think or if he’s judging you for being childish etc just be yourself that’s what he likes and be sure he’s just as big a kid most of the time. I definitely see me in a few of the categories. The 18 year old, scaredy cat and wow me woman.
None of us are perfect by any means but if your just going to “ruin” yourself, then its fair game to be called out. If you were born with a missing limb, deaf, cleft palate, MS, blind or some other birth defect its completely different and I personally overlook this because this is not the persons fault. At the same time, putting a cow ring through your nose is and tells everyone you are starving for attention and you probably need mental help. The majority of single Muzz women within my age range were typically divorced professionals juggling demanding jobs, children, tricky ex-husbands and being perpetually exhausted. What I found extremely educational was the realisation that the most critical factor in evaluating a potential partner was availability and logistics – or A&L, as I call it. For example, many men favour single women with teenage kids, as they have more time for dating than those occupied with younger children.
It takes both for a well-rounded relationship. You want a man you can learn from, regardless of his age. Just make sure he’s not taking on the role of your teacher without you wanting him to be. Having a relationship with an older man without the focus being on raising children gives you the ability to really bond and connect with no distractions. There’s appeal in that, and you can’t always find it with a younger guy who’s still struggling to find his foothold in his career. Being financially stable isn’t about making $300k a year.
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I read a few articles from women giving dating advice to women. They warn women of older men who never married or has kids then they go on to tell them they are afraid of commitment and stuff. I got 1 reply and she yelled at me “How dare you write me, it is clear we have nothing in common, don;t ever waste me time again.”, yikes, dodged a bullet on that one for sure.
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I also don’t yearn of having kids or getting married I want the companionship and if marriage is important to him, I wouldn’t mind doing it for the love of my life. For me, my happiness is more important than anything. I would like to meet someone who is happy with themselves, kind to others, reliable, consistent, interesting, who appreciates traveling the world. Having common hobbies would help a lot and someone who I don’t have to support monetarily.
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It still means more to me, even though he has been gone over a year now. I Fabre love someone we want the very best for them. And if the very best isn’t me, it hurts but I don’t want to hold him back or weigh him down. I have a feeling it has more to do with me being more of a match for wits and intelligence which does not give him the position he’s use to. I must be worth more that a 20 year old prostitute. I’m not getting the social respect or financial help of a partner.
I wish I could say I’m happy, but I’m very unfulfilled. I grew up with very traditional beliefs of gender roles , and so I feel like I did what I was “supposed” to do as a wife, and I ended up being forced into the provider “masculine” role. I would much rather be my old self again, and have my family back together. My former husband and I were very much in love once. I’m sure we both made mistakes along the way to contribute to the breakdown of our marriage, but life happens and nobody is perfect. Sometimes things happen so fast and we can get distracted with children and the pursuit of careers and then you can wake up one day and everything is different and it’s too late.
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Maybe you prefer that he checks on you throughout the day with a “how’s it going” text. But he’d much rather call you on his lunch break, because texting isn’t his ~generation~. That’s something that the two of you will have to work out. Learning each other’s love languages might be a great place to start. That said, if he has kids from that relationship, that’s something else to consider. Will you be involved in their lives?
They may be flakey, but at least they haven’t had enough time to become jaded & give up on love. I am happy just miss having my best friend to enjoy life with. Actual Mike is likely the exact type of man that most women complain about. Tall, better than average income, strong social circle, ability to travel, former bad boy, and attracts most women.
